Our children need to know that we believe in them, that we trust them, that we support them, that we love them, that we acknowledge them as individuals separate from us. We love all of our readers and we want to you to know how much youre appreciated! Thank you for always being such a supportive partner. You cannot be proud of anything you were born with, only with what you achieve. Why are you taking the credit for my effort? (I'd prefer "Congratulations! until recently when a Goddaughter won an amazing internship, beating 2000 other applicants, and her other Godmother put a message on Facebook saying how proud she was of her. 2. 0. I cannot tell you how happy I am, for her, to witness her achievement and how much I admire her tenacity in overcoming all she has. Disclaimer: The articles, blogs, testimonials and P.E.T. I think the internet and social media have eaten her brain that she would not only allow their @#[emailprotected] clueless comment to remain public, but that she thanked them? Stay in the know when we release new content! The phrase "Im proud of you" insinuates that the speaker (parent, teacher, co-worker, boss) has more experience, or power, or in some manner has the right to pronounce their opinion, on someone elses effort. He's proud of you. Be proud of who you are. Home / How Do I Respond To Im proud of you? Everything you do is with excellence. Please contact info@parentskills.com.au for further information. I have deep concerns if children crave to hear "I'm proud of you" because they want to know that their parents approve of them - of their behaviour, of their decisions in life. I know you and I haven't been seeing eye-to-eye lately. They may start to see their parent as being insincere, or even manipulative. Its more potent because they have seen struggles in their life, and within that perspective, they still acknowledge the effort I have put into the achievement as deserving of recognition. About 5 years ago, an ex college girlfriend and I began emailing each other occasionally (not often just once every 2-3 months or so). 7. I think you deserve the credit for this all. "), Parent: "Im proud that you got all As in your school report/won that tennis trophy", How might you feel as the child? Drake - Redemption Lyrics | Genius Lyrics PJ. Fascinating post in two regards. But, the real credit goes to you and you only! Express your own feelings of appreciation and gratitude. But only emotionally intelligent people understand why. Suddenly I found myself questioning my rather lame Im thrilled for you. True - the parent might have spent hours helping the child get their homework done or even completing the childs assignment. Don't remind them how far they've come. It is a feeling of relief and it was all worth while you bringing them up properly. Love you so much. Might as well as them to stop saying yall or bless her heart.. 6 Things a Narcissist Would Never Do | Psych Central I wouldnt say Im proud of you in this situation. They seem to make him quite happy. This canstop the development of their own, "You look really pleased with your effort". I had an experience where a friend, who I consider in every way my equal, noticed that I made a healthy food choice (not that I didnt before, but I think its the first time he noticed) and he said, Oh Im so proud of you!. Pause, take a deep breath, and remember who you really are. 25 EPIC Bible Verses About Pride And Humility (Proud Heart) 7. She continually updates her course with new examples and relevant material from the latest research. I also have to let go of holding it against him, because I presume it was a well-meaning gaffeinstead of saying how happy he is for me, as hes never been belittling before. I also told her I had a great time & that she picks up my spirits. From what I read, she falls into the category of know them well but I wonder if its not something a bit out of place. And John is left feeling confused and despondent. But, it can also be a bit overwhelming because it puts the spotlight on us and can make us feel exposed. 10. They may find it difficult to take pride in who they are and what they have achieved. Some years ago I attended a parenting seminar, where the speaker incidentally mentioned avoiding the phrase "Im proud of you". I was actually kicked out of my house at 16 by her and her new husband and had financial trouble during my years in school that she had contributed to, how in the hell can she be proud of me when all she did was hinder me? I didnt expect that this would mean so much for us. Thats the response I was expecting from you. You are happy they are an ambassador for you. It was then that I realized that who I am is a unique, valuable, and loveable person. Proverbs 18:12 Before destruction the heart of man is haughty, but humility goes before honor. Setting goals you can achieve, also called "realist goals," reduces the chance of frustration or doubting yourself or your abilities. Don't disguise it as concern, either. . Well, that truly makes my day. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies. 1. If you get a new job, get a participants medal for a 10K or do anything deemed worthwhile, friends, family and acquaintances will say they are so proud of you!!!. Similarly, if someone tries to imply a mentor relationship by telling you, Im proud of you, its like a bad parent trying to claim the rights and status of a good one. February 18, 2023 There are people who interpret life as if it were all about a fight of egos. The Problem with 'I'm So Proud of You' (And What to Say Instead) - HuffPost How to Support Your Quitter | Smokefree And Ill encourage them to be proud. "This isn't easy, but you did the right thing." Sometimes supporting a friend and letting them know you're proud takes the form of helping them cope with a difficult decision they made. Is it OK to respond to "I am proud of you" with "Me to", "So do I", and "I am too", and "I am proud of you too"? Also, theyre proud of you, when you do something like your family has been doing or you did something way greater or different than anyone in your family so far. She reciprocated. In most situation expresses negative connotations, such as "He is very ", which means he is over proud of himself (). I think the phrase Im proud of you is insulting, for the reasons noted above. It isnt. 16. Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude is also a great way to show appreciation to others. But what exactly does this phrase mean and how should you respond to it? They may become adults who are vulnerable, who do not have a strong sense of self-worth. When someone tells you that they are proud of you, not only are they impressed by something you did and who you are, but they also want others to know it. A compliment like this means a lot to us, seeing that we give our people a chance to be happy and proud because of us. 4 . 6. (I'd prefer "Wow, that must have taken some thought and courage! It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. You haven't said who is speaking to whom. implying a mentor relationship. 14. 25. What Does the Bible Say About Being Proud Of Sin? Do you really think this had a lot of positive impact on many children? Taking a few deep breaths can help you focus. 1 y. 1. Yeah, If grandpa was here, he would have said the same. Interesting perspective. Because of this, it might feel awkward to say "I'm proud of you" to a friend or colleague, even if you mean it. This mindset will help you achieve your goals, too. Most of the time, having pride about someone else comes from a place of superiority. And now, that you have the other responses to I am proud of you, you can share the same based on whos saying this and after which event. So thank you Ben, for after read the above I feel happy with my Im thrilled for you, You must feel really proud and the like. 2. Is it wrong to be proud of your accomplishments? This "mental timeout" gives you the space to process the insulting remark in light of what it was; someone's thoughtlessness or an attack meant to provoke a reaction. Be proud that you are here. What, do you really? Let them know that you are grateful for their support and that you appreciate their words. "Be proud of your scars. But I believe that spouses say it, and siblings. 'A Total Failure': The Proud Boys Now Mock Trump Rather than the child feeling respected for their efforts, they may feel patronised, put-down. You could also feel patronised. But you'd like some clarity on what he really means when he says that. How often do we utter this common parenting phrase, in moments of pleasure at our childs latest achievement? My friends tell me that rather often so like once every month or so, which I think is a lot, if you say it more often you'll take it for granted for sure. I have a one year old boy and a two month old boy, and I had my first day back at work yesterday. Those of us who were brought up around this attitude are understandably wary of the phrase, and likely to avoid it. And Im so ashamed of you. I guess its an odd word and I stay away from it because I know how sensitive I am to it. An FBI witness says that members of the far-right Proud Boys had hoped to assassinate Vice President Mike Pence and Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi during last week's violent storming of the U.S . 15. Believe me when I tell you that it is not meant so kindly elsewhere. So tell them it feels like you are bothering them. Here are 5 other ways to say "I'm proud of you" to older children: 06 "It's been an honor to watch you grow up." This can be used for both a teen and an adult. The proud feeling transcends from child to parent. Glad that I keep our family tradition alive. You worked so hard, you really deserve that job! My experiences with people saying they were proud of me (or at least making me aware in other ways that they were proud of me) first came from my own parents, mostly my dad. What if you really are proud of the person? With teens and adults, saying "I'm proud of you" is a bit different. If a friend said it to me, I might say "Thank you", but I'd be thinking "Well, who gave you authority over me, then?". Oh, youre one of my trusted supporters! Later, I saw her in a restaurant and apologized for balling her out in public. Who put in the practice in order to win that tennis match? Thanks. the person who says that is actually talking about themselves, not about me, and by saying that is drawing the recognition away from me towards themselves. I can make it possible only because you give me hope. 5. What your walk really says about you - BBC Future This is a noble endeavor. ), belonging to my close friend, on her business page. Consider why you so are grateful for this thing or person. Is the childs achievement actually a reflection of their parents achievement? . For what? 26. Encouraging children and others to be proud of themselves is healthier. So we arranged to have her drive to the hotel where I was staying and we drove there together. relationship advice marriage advice Women love advice. "Nothing is ever wrong. It may not display this or other websites correctly. Most times, people use "I am busy" as a tool for avoidance. Had I ever thought about the meaning behind these words? Its also important to remember the power of positive reinforcement and the benefits of responding with gratitude. If you feel stuck on getting that pride going or can't seem to identify the traits or qualities you're most proud of in yourself, go back in time. Briefly, some difficulties include: Four-year-old John shows his Mum a painting he's just done. Image used under license from Shutterstock, Larissa Dann. Let them know how much better you feel now that you're smokefree. In what context? A good friend of mine, who has had a tough life, has just written and published her first book. Then there's emotional attraction. Praise such as this is a subject on its own much research and many, many books have been written on the negative aspects of praise. It seems to me that the authors of the study used the phrase 'I'm proud of you' as a catch-all measurement, to reflect a parent's emotional connection with, and support, for, their child - and that it was this emotional involvement that provided protection against suicidal ideation. Your friend wants to say "I am proud of you too, my friend". Words have power and they can have a profound effect on us. 90 Good Comebacks, Roasts & One-Liners For Sick Burns - YourTango Better Responses 2023. I'll help with whatever you need to make it . It got me thinking, "How many people could send me that sort of email?" Why You Shouldn't Say "I'm So Proud of You" - Alyson Schafer How Do I Tell Him I Like Him The Best Method (Proven), What Does It Mean When She Calls You Daddy, Im so glad that youre proud of me. They dont have more power than you, and in some cases less, but their opinion matters because they know you so well, and because you respect them and what they think. "I wish I had met you. This will help to create a bond between the two of you and will strengthen your relationship. said Christopher Robin. When we avoid the phrase Im proud of you, we allow our children to be their own person, to grow to their own potential - in a relationship of mutual respect. If youre proud of me, buy me a pizza, then. 8. The Mindset of the Ambitious Educational Elite, Thinking Clearly about a Persons Substance Amidst Stylistic Differences, On Intentionally Vague, Mystique-Infused Explanations of Talent, Book Notes: Lost & Found by Kathryn Shulz, Mindfulness of Consciousness Meditation Retreat. Whatever you did today was the way it was meant to be. You might say: "I'm so proud of you for trying to quit smoking. My former partner just recently told me that he was proud of me after major accomplishment. Anyone who overthinks any form of compliments or think's that there are hidden agendas or people are not being completely honest about what they say, should take a step back and ask themselves why they are thinking those thoughts, personally i believe it's more about them and not what is being said about the phrase. 12. Great to hear this. Im proud of myself, although saying it out loud doesnt make it better. but with my Mothers words of wisdom always echoing. You shouldnt be. 27. Who is saying this to whom? It will show your appreciation for their words, it will help to strengthen your relationship, and it will create a positive and constructive environment. Im proud of you could be seen as an external judgement a parents verdict on a childs performance. Focus on what is positive in their life and avoid getting overly . Its just a colloquialism for way to go or awesome sauce or good for you! No one means to be condescending or imply they got you there in some way. Want to Change the Way you React to Your Children? Most of the time, having pride about someone else comes from a place of superiority. How to Tell Someone You Are Proud Of Them Quotes(Top 18) - Mind Blood I guess after receiving the compliment, I felt that he was patronizing me, because I have only had my parents or teachers say they were proud of me. They include: courage, commitment, imagination and compassion, and oh yes, patience -- lots of it -- because it doesn't happen overnight. "), Friend: "I'm proud of you for being brave and standing up to your boss", As the friend who has found that courage, is this statement something you would appreciate? "A proud man is always looking down on things and people; and, of course, as long as you are looking down, you cannot see something that is above you." - C.S Lewis 2. 16. Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude can help to boost your confidence and can help you to overcome self-doubt. As your friend I want you to know that there is nothing I wouldn't do for you. They just say it. I felt great to know he as proud of me, especially after he had read my term report cards in high school. In these instances, simply saying "Wow" (and meaning it) will let them know you're proud. But some of us never heard the expression in our lives till we were adults. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. What to Say to Someone on Their Sobriety Anniversary - Taylor Recovery 35 Proud Quotes On Success | AwakenTheGreatnessWithin I wish everyone had a genuine friend like you. Its very presumptuous. Maybe Im mad, because it makes me feel like he thinks I wasnt doing enough before I started back at work- like carrying children inside of my body for nearly two years, plus birthing them, plus never sleeping, plus cleaning for HOURS upon HOURS everyday, plus cooking, plus plus plus wasnt enough to be proud of. Also, I really like the litmus test of how you would feel on the receiving end. On Wednesday, a Proud Boy leader, Joseph . My ex just said the same thing to me yesterday and it just didnt sound right to me. I wouldnt get anxious about it. Yea, Thank you is not the only response. Thanks! This expression is much more self-focused, i.e. Second, this very fact helps explain why we resent it if the praise comes from someone who isnt viewed as a mentor. Pretty much an entire generation of American kids heard it from Mr. Rogers. Required fields are marked *. 4. Now, John may hear "I'm disappointed that this is the same picture. How to accept a compliment (without sounding like a douche) First, there's physical attraction. I think its about the underlying meaning of these words to a child. The best way to do this is to express your own feelings of appreciation. . I agree that its a phrase that is really reserved for the individual doing, or accomplishing something, i.e. Although its worth taking a mental note of that in case a pattern does develop. Your email address will not be published. Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool that can help to encourage and motivate people. Thank you for your kind words.. Here are some examples of ways you can respond to Im proud of you: These responses will show your appreciation for their words and will help to strengthen your relationship. Someone else's pride in you does not usually translate to pride in yourself. Ive told you that, youre going to feel proud of me. After the game I took her back to her car, gave her a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. "How long have you been sober?". Listen to your inner wisdom, and make a note of the meaning that resonates with you. . Didnt your manager think you were capable of putting such a report together? Congratulations to our dearest son. While "sb is proud of him" can express positive meaning. ), Partner: "I'm proud of you for landing that job", While you might understand that your partner is being supportive, might you also feel a bit miffed? I wanted to know whether or not I was overreacting.He had no hand in my achievements and since he was the one who caused me those problems, I feel he has lost every right to use that phrase with me. The effect of this praise might be opposite to the aim of the parent. Be proud of you." - Oprah Winfrey 3. I googled a sentence on this topic to see if anyone had written on it (hoping they had). Your email address will not be published. It means she feels proud for what you've done or achieved. but not the p-word.
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